Theoretical Whatever

The way casino bonuses are calculated has never made sense to me. Why the heck is my theoretical loss more valuable than my actual loss? I have never been given a good answer.

I get really tired of ripping massive amounts and getting shitty bonuses because I DiDnT wAgEr EnOuGh... so I came up with the idea of Theoretical Wager.

WTF is Theoretical Wager?

Well... casinos obsess over what they call theoretical loss: your total wager multiplied by the house edge of whatever you played. Theoretical loss doesn't care if you won or lost. It only cares what their math says you should have lost. That's where people like me, who blow our balance in seconds and have very little wager, get fucked.

Which brings us to Theoretical Wager. Loss ÷ edge = theoretical wager. Meaning, the amount of wager it would normally take to produce a loss that size.

Lose $1,000 on a 1% edge game? That's $100,000 in theoretical wager, whether you got there in six hours or one very stupid spin.

So the part of the bonus formulas that currently use “wager” becomes whichever is bigger: your actual wager or your theoretical wager.

How would it work?

Bonuses: Anything currently using wager × edge in the formula now uses effective wager, whichever is bigger between your actual wager and your theoretical wager. Weeklies, monthlies, reloads, even affiliate commissions could run on this. (But I won't hold my breath.)

Leaderboards: Leaderboards are a wager competition, that's the point of them, and loss divided by edge as a leaderboard score would just pay people to go broke on purpose for a digital trophy. Terrible idea, don't do that. (I'll be back another time to talk about weighted wagering and other things that shouldn't exist.)

Alright, that's my idea.

Try not to fuck it up.

-Mandy